Monday, December 12, 2005

Whither To Decorate?

Dear Rev. Jack,

Even though it's only December 3, I am disheartened by my lack of progress in the Christmas decorating area.

I put a wreath on my door just so people wouldn't think I was an atheist or something, but I haven't gotten my tree up or my lights out.

Every night, my neighbor's Christmas lights torment me with their cheeriness, as if to say, "We're ready, why not you? We're ready, why not you?" as they blink mockingly at me through the window.

As I see it, I have three options:

1. Get off my ass and decorate.

2. Gain some perspective and relax.

3. Close my curtains at night.

What do you think?


Blogger Rev. Jack said...

Take one of your empty Oberweis bottles and fill it 1 third egg nog, 1 third bacardi 151, and the final third with gasoline.

Stick a piece of old santa stocking material in the neck, light it and throw it through your neighbors window.

That'll show 'em.

xoxo Rev. Jack

p.s. I'm currently (temporarily) not speaking to the person who posted this. She knows why...

December 12, 2005 10:50 AM  
Blogger Übermilf said...

You act as if I were the primary decision-maker, which I was not.

There was a blinding snowstorm. Well, it was blinding for about an hour, and then it was just snowing normally ... I blame... Dr. Sardonic. He was jealous that we were going and he was not, so he sent his evil weather machine to dump snow on us until we gave up hope of attending...

I was going to make a wreath out of twinkies, cool whip and marachino cherries.

December 13, 2005 12:44 PM  
Blogger Rev. Jack said...

Probably was his fault...

xoxo Rev. Jack

December 13, 2005 1:41 PM  
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January 30, 2013 8:24 AM  

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